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Report from Iraq

Minister Taru has been in contact with Ladonia censors in Iraq:

Our official Censors Ants and Anty say that they decided to send Ladonian Military “Intelligence” 6 agents to Iraq, because they can’t cause any extra harm there.

Now they passed me a telegraph reading:

LITTLE PROBLEMS SETTLING IN HERE. ON THE PLANE WE READ “TEACH YOURSELF: HOW TO BE A GOOD MUSLIM.” OTHERWISE OK, BUT WE FOUND THAT OUR COMPASS POINTING TO MECCA IS SOUTHERN HEMISPHERE COMPASS GIVEN AS A “SPECIAL OFFER” WITH THE COMPASSES MINISTER OF FINANCE ORDERED FOR OUR AIR FORCE. SO WE FIRST PRAYED TOWARDS THE NORTH POLE. WE WERE CURSED AS “SHIAS” BUT WE MANAGED TO GET AWAY SAYING: “CALM DOWN BROTHER, WE ALL HAVE THE SAME GOD.” THAT SILENCED THEM. LET’S SEE WHAT THE NEW DAY WILL BRING.

ANTON LM”I”6

Today we were just walking by a bazar when we heard a loud bang and people screaming everywhere. We went closer and saw the terrifying sight: something that once had been a car was smoking, bleeding kids everywhere, crying mothers and angry fathers.
“Who can do anything like this?” we asked the crowd.
“It must be Abu Amr,” one man replied.
“How can anyone having relatives and friends here do a thing like this,” we wondered, but the crowd corrected: “They have no relatives and friends here. Abu Amr preaches in a mosque in Jordan.”
“We must go there to stop this,” Thomas concluded.
“But first we are needed here,” I said and took Magic Healing Lotion from under my kaftan. Anton understood at once and took a seriously wounded little girl to his arms. The kid was screaming from pain when Thomas pulled pieces of glass and metal from her small body, but that must be done for Magic Healing Lotion to work.
You see, Magic Healing Lotion is a secret product available for us agents only (it would be dangerous if criminals and enemy agents could use it, otherwise bad guys falling from the roof or being hit by a car during their flight would survive, and that of course is not the point). You have seen its effects in agent movies, where agents recover from bullet wounds at once after the object being removed and the lotion used. It seems we need more of that here. We must send an order at once, in case these 14 kids are not the only wounded people we will meet here.

Martin LM”I”6


Somewhere here our censors can be found

Lars Vilks

Lars Vilks is the artist behind Nimis and Arx, the Founder and State Secretary of Ladonia. He is also the Editor in Chief of the Ladonia Herald.

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