The Interim President, Minister of Art & Jump, Fredrik Axwik is one of the candidates in the president election. He sends these words to our citizens:
“My Fellow Ladonians:
I don’t need to tell you that we live in inclement times. The savage winds of winter strain the very fibers of Nimis. The gales of international regression bring countless drifts of woe unto our fair nation, stressing the depths of our resolve and plastering a slick rime of uncertainty upon our nice green flag. But in this sunless season, I say to you that there is Light……there is Hope…..there is a road to a fairer dawn. All one need to do is Jump.
Now, I know my opponents will try to paint me as a charlatan… But I am not disheartened by such rash speculation, because I know that I share the same fundamental values as you, the Ladonian electorate. Have we not supped from the same Roast Beast? Have we not stood elbow-to-elbow? Have we not, as free men and women, stood under the beatific light of the Ladonian moon? Yes, I have looked into your eyes, as you have looked into mine. Es muy simpatico. And when the question is asked, as it has been since the beginning of this election, “Quien es mas macho?”, you know and I know that there has never been any real question.
And so your decision is clear. Vote with your liver! Vote with your spleen! Vote with your heart……..not the halting and self-recriminating heart of a Monday morning, but the wild, exuberant heart of a Friday afternoon! Elect the only candidate who can handle the darkness, who knows the darkness, and who has a strobe-light belt buckle and extra batteries. Dance with me unto a new day for Ladonia, crash upon the beanbag chairs of prosperity, and rise to the sumptuous migas of a Ladonian future free from international interference or moral scrutiny…..free from judgment, guilt or shame.
Vote for the jumping President!
Go ahead, and jump!!!
I thank you.”